Thursday, August 27, 2009

Real Life is Unrealistic: Too Dumb too Live

I love acting. It is so much more real than life.
—
Oscar Wilde

Once again it seems that life will indeed imitate art...or rather art will prove to me that life is a chaotic malestrom without rhyme nor reason.  For this example, open up your nostalgia bibles and turn to the book of the Burton verse 1989.

We cant' stop here, this is bat country!
 Tim Burton and John Peters released the first serious adaptation of Batman the general non-comicy public became aware of; though really full credit for returning batman his lost dignity goes to Frank Miller, Allan Moore, and of course Denny O'Neil (or as I call him, Jesus).  While over all a decent movie florishing under Burton's stylistic German expressionist slant, it did have a bit of a campy feel.  Lacking the gritty realism of the later Dark Knight franchise, Burton's Batman had the feel of a Carnival of the Soul.  The focus wasn't on presenting a story as it might actually occur...but basically putting on a giant Cirque du Soleil show. 
Quick to the bat trapeze!  
 
Anyway... one of the biggest problems I had with the movie, the single thing that broke my suspension of disbelief in a film involving Jack Nicholson poisoning people with laughing gas and Michael Keton dressing up as a homicidal fury, was the third act in which the Joker lures the entire city of Gotham like lambs to a slaughter.  The Joker throws a parade flinging fists full of money out to the crowd, which successfully draws them out into the streets.  Of course he plans to just poison the fuckers.  And everyone should have known that because he'd spent the whole movie...poisoning people.  His motives were transparently clear!  Imagine if you will that Osama Bin Ladin comes on TV announces he's throwing a parade and giving away money and invites everyone to gather themselves into a crowded street to grab their share.  What the frak do you THINK will happen if anyone is dumb enough to show up?  This was so stupid, that I couldn't buy it.  Surely people had enough self interest NOT to do something transparently deleterious to themselves.
Pictured: The Government The Bailout Plan






I owe Tim Burton an apology.

good lord you people are morons... I mean, really.  How dumb can you be!?

The head of a Muslim women's association says only a minority of Malian women - "the intellectuals" as she put it - supports the law
....ok that's pretty dumb.  When you're argument amounts to "ONLY SMART PEOPLE AGREE TO THIS" you really don't have much a leg to stand on.  

Above: Feminist Intellectual\
""It's a tiny minority of women here that wants this new law - the intellectuals. The poor and illiterate women of this country - the real Muslims - are against it,""

How Malians Picture Intellectuals
Really, how can you get more anti-intellectual than this?  Here we have women fighting FOR the right to be treated as property (as suggested by the Koran).  Sweet Raptor Jesus...  Ladies...just down a bottle of Smilex it'll be quicker!   At least with the Joker Parade of Peril there was an immediate gain to be had.  Here people are going against a proposal to give them shit, rejecting a gift horse by punching it straight in the mouth.
EMANCIPATION?
YOU PUT US BACK IN SHACKLES THIS INSTANT, DAMN IT!


So...once again; Real Life is Unrealistic.


9 comments:

EB said...

Holy flamewar, ingMan!

Seriously, if anyone rags on this, I wouldn't give them a moment of my time, since that is absurd. And scary. Why does misogyny anger me even more when coming from female hands? Hmmm.

Anyway, this http://www.nytimes.com/2009/08/23/magazine/23Women-t.html?_r=3&pagewanted=1 made me a little more hopeful the other day, and a little teary-eyed. So much work to be done, so many layers to excavate.

I think a revisiting here of the Burton-Batman might be cool. Really rigorously go over it, the conventions not only of the comic, but tehBurton, and early 90s cinema. We're gonna get lit-crit on it's butt if you're up to it ;)


Love,

your favorite feminist intellectual (non-PVC edition)

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